A lasting and healthy relationship is a serious challenge that can be made easy through kindness and generosity.
Anyone that has been in a long-term relationship understands the day to day difficulties of living together or the conflicts that arise from future paths that do not align with each other. Scientists, however, have identified a few common characteristics in couples that in addition to remaining together for many years have healthy and satisfying relationships.
With a Ph.D. in psychology from the University of Minnesota, Dr. Ty Tashiro reveals the research on what makes a marriage last or not in the book The Science of Happily Ever After. The research accounts for a large number of couples from over a long period of time. To the surprise of many, the key to a lasting marriage was found in a seemingly obvious, yet often overlooked, quality: kindness.
When kindness is practiced reciprocally in a couple, each party feels important to the other, and feels loved. This can be demonstrated through simple acts of generosity such as becoming engaged in the other’s interests, even if they are not your own. If one person in the relationship is criticized and spoken negatively to about their passions, this can be damaging to them. Dr. Tashiro also emphasized being emotionally stabile as a fundamental characteristic for having a successful relationship.
While there are many causes and variables that influence how a partnership develops, these small acts of generosity that rekindle affection are a good first step to a long life of happiness together.