As you age, the key is connecting from the heart so that physical contact can activate hormones that make you feel alive.
Advisor: Chiquinquirá Blandón
Specialist in Clinical Psychology
As we age, our habits change and we experience physical changes and other ways to approach life. Age also comes with cultural and social preconceptions that don’t always correspond to reality, such as myths and fears related to women’s sexuality during menopause.
“During menopause, a woman’s level of estrogen drops. It’s something that happens and can be treated throughout life. Aspects such as emotional abuse, physical abuse, depression, anxiety, an unfaithful spouse, thyroid problems or irritable bowel syndrome can affect women’s sexuality, which needs to be restored in order to guarantee a healthy sex life,” states Chiquinquirá Blandón, specialist in Clinical Psychology and certified therapist in EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing).
Between 45 and 55 years old, the ovaries progressively diminish their production of estrogen and other hormones such as progesterone, “so, the only thing that could affect sexuality during menopause is dryness because there is not as much lubrication. However, there are topical products for this that work perfectly well,” comments Blandón, who also advises using a condom to diminish the possibility of pain and make the encounter easier and more pleasurable.
Freedom and perception of beauty
Be it rolls or belly fat, weight gain or flabbiness, cellulite or wrinkles, expert Chiquinquirá Blandón explains that body image is not only a factor of age, but also a woman’s lack of self-esteem can lead to trauma that can affect the relationship with their own body and alter her sex life. Moreover, she assures that the “eyes of love do not look at curves, and if the person is connected by love, eroticism will come from the heart, and we can look at each other, talk, and share any doubt or fear that we have about our body. If there is open, healthy, and calm communication, the person will have an active sex life for however long they decide to”.
Although menopause is associated with stages of life such as the “empty nest” syndrome or retirement, it is a time for couples to have more time to enjoy a pleasurable sexuality. “Sex can be much better if we make the connection love + sex + life. When our only objective is not penetration or orgasm, the connection is heart to heart. Couples will see each other, hug, and caress each other. If the situation escalates enough, they can reach orgasm, and if not, the good thing is that a woman’s excitement is cumulative”.
The Clinical Psychology specialist emphasizes that “it is our responsibility to maintain an active and healthy sexuality because it fulfills a vital role that is also related to love”.
Igniting the spark
Body and heart. Doing exercise, having a balanced diet, strengthening your self-image, being happy, loving yourself, and leaving stress behind are all actions that can lead to a healthy sexuality.
Mind. Having sexual thoughts and fantasies will help activate testosterone and, biologically, compensate for the natural decrease in estrogen.
It takes two. Don’t lose sight of spending time as a couple, having new experiences and changing your routine, as this will help you stay interested and maintain a healthy sex life.
Related: Signs of menopause